Feeding Elephants

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Drunk Jokes

A rather inebriated fellow on a bus was tearing up a newspaper into tiny pieces and throwing them out the window. “Excuse me,” said the woman sitting next to him. “But, would you mind explaining why you’re doing this?” “It scares away the elephants,” replied the drunk. “But I don’t see any elephants around here,” […]

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Mother In Law

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Farmer Jokes

A small farm boy was milking his cow when all of a sudden a bull came charging towards him. As horrified workers nearby watched, the boy calmly continued his milking. To everyone’s astonishment, the bull stopped a few inches from the boy, turned around and walked away. “Weren’t you afraid?” one of the workers asked […]

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Cat Consultant

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, One Liners

Overheard at the veterinarian’s “I had my cat neutered. He’s still out all night with the other cats, but now he’s a consultant.”

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Raffle Prize

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks “Where did you get that?” A: The pig says, “I won her in a raffle!”

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What? What?

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: What does a blonde owl say? A: What, what?

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Crowd Of Three

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: What do you call 3 blondes, a chimp, and another blonde standing on a street corner? A: 4 f*cks, 4 f*cks, 4 f*cks, not for a zillion f*cks, 4 f*cks!

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Lipstick

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: What’s the difference between a pit bull and a blonde with PMS? A: Lipstick.

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Drink Direct

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk? A: The cow fell on her.

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Shit Sense

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: Why did god give blonds 2% more brains than horses? A: Because he didn’t want them shitting in the streets during parades.

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Any Cock Will Do!

Posted by admin under Animal Jokes, Blonde Jokes

Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a rooster? A: In the morning a rooster says, “Cock’ll-doodl-doooo”, while a blonde says, “Any-cock’ll-doooo.”

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