Money Tatto

Posted by admin under Crazy Jokes, Marriage Jokes

A man entered a tattoo parlor on the lower west side and wanted to get a tattoo. ‘What can I do for you?’ asked the tattoo artist. ‘Well,’ the man replied, ‘I want a $100 dollar bill tattooed on my danger.’ ‘I’ve never had that request before. Do you mind if I ask why?’ ‘Well, […]

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Dick Disability

Posted by admin under Marriage Jokes

A man came home from the Social Security Office. ‘Honey,’ he said to his wife, ‘I finally convinced them that I’m old enough to collect Social Security.’ ‘How?’ his wife asked. ‘Since the department of records in the small town you were born in was flooded, you can’t get a copy of your birth certificate.’ […]

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Populating the Earth

Posted by admin under Adam & Eve Jokes

After a few days, the Lord called Adam to Him, and said, ‘It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the Earth, so I want you to start by kissing Eve.’ Adam answered, ‘Yes Lord, but what’s a ‘kiss’?’ So the Lord gave Adam a brief description and Adam then […]

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Walking Snails

Posted by admin under Marriage Jokes

A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for all the major status figures in Rome, Italy. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn’t have any snails for this dinner party, so she asked her husband to […]

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Road to The End

Posted by admin under Funny Quotes, Marriage Jokes

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

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Uninterrupted for 18 Months

Posted by admin under Funny Quotes, Marriage Jokes

I haven’t spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don’t like to interrupt her.

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Opening Up

Posted by admin under Marriage Jokes, Men, Women

Q. How many men does it take to open a beer? A. None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

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Hard to Hide

Posted by admin under Marriage Jokes

A man was complaining to a friend: ‘I had it all… Money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!’ “What happened?” asked the friend. ‘My wife found out…’

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Miss Always Right

Posted by admin under Funny Quotes, Marriage Jokes

I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.

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Argument Mania

Posted by admin under Funny Quotes, Men, Women

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

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